Fifteen Speed Cassette - Revealed!

Following the amazing leaks about Campagnolo's ground breaking new Eleven Speed Cassette based groupsets, it has been revealed that Shimano is on the verge of unveiling their own Electronic Twelve Speed competitor. Logic therefore tells us that the leaking of the SRAM Thirteen Speed effort is only days away.

In a first for Blogscrement I can now reveal that, right out of left field, Microsoft will announce the release of their own Fifteen Speed Groupset later this week. The revolutionary new groupset will feature a derailleur system utilising "Quantum Action at a Distance" actuation. This will allow the gear to be changed moments before the rider thinks of moving the lever. The new MS Dish 1.0 wheel specification, rather than just making the rear axle ever wider will use inverted dishing of the wheel on the drive side. While weakening the wheel somewhat Microsoft CEO and Founder, Bill Gates claims that this will only be an issue is the wheel is misused by cornering to the right. The most amazing part of the technology seems to involve not knowing what actual gear you are in and something to do with a cat in a box. They're said to be working on super light-weight carbon fibre cats.

All of this causes me something of a dilemma. Being something of a Luddite, my last groupset upgrade went straight from a 1970's Super Record 5 speed (quaintly referred to as 10 speed in those days) to an Ultegra 10 speed (shouldn't that be 20 speed). Now it looks like I'll be able to make another 5 cog jump, maybe I should be looking at this stuff. Or maybe I should wait until I can double it again to a 20 cog cassette.

Anyway, I'm in no imminent danger of having to make a decision quickly. The early 2009 release date to be announced is certain to slip until 2015 in true Microsoft fashion.